(scroll down for the english version – vean al pie de página para la versión en español)
Je suis déçue, écœurée, dégoûtée… Alors qu’il y a chaque jour à grande échelle davantage de raisons de perdre espoir en la race humaine, d’autres se surajoutent dans notre vie quotidienne et je me demande parfois comment continuer à voir positif.
Je sais bien qu’à côté des attentats de Boston, de l’effondrement d’un immeuble en France dans une ville où vivent des amis à moi et un séisme en Chine dont personne ne s’occupe tant ils sont focalisés sur d’autres sujets, mes petits tracas quotidiens ne font que pâles figures. Le problème, c’est que je ne supporte pas le vol, je gère très mal la frustration de ne pas pouvoir me défendre, la frustration de ne pouvoir rien faire et du coup laisser continuer ceux qui volent en toute impunité. Une fois déjà, j’ai eu du mal à avaler la pilule, mais une seconde fois à peine 2 mois plus tard?!?
Comprenez mon désarroi : sans appareil photo depuis décembre, je m’étais – avec vos précieux conseils – décidé à en acheter un compact pour palier à mon manque, que j’aurais ensuite donné à Raul pour qu’il rejoue plus souvent au photographe excellent qu’il est. Ces petites choses étant moins chères en France, je l’achète sur une page internet française, le fait livrer chez ma mère, qui le sort de sa boîte, l’emmitouffle dans une chaussette, l’enroule dans une serviette, le protège des coups éventuels et des yeux trop curieux, le met au milieu d’un paquet avec tout plein d’autres gourmandises françaises dont je raffole et envoie le tout au Mexique, comme d’habitude. Sauf que cette fois, à peine soit-disant sorti de la douane, le paquet disparaît de la circulation… comme par hasard.
1ère déception et frustration…
Alors que 2 amies françaises arrivent fin avril pour passer leurs premières vacances au Mexique et m’amènent un deuxième exemplaire de l’appareil que je me suis résolue à acheter, leurs valises sont « malencontreusement » oubliées lors de leur escale douanière à Mexico city…. le « hasard » devient sordide… d’autant plus qu’en récupérant les valises 24h plus tard, il y manque… leurs et mon appareils photos!!
!!!! La frustration augmente exponientiellement !!!!
Ce que j’apprends :
- peut-être serait-il plus sage que je ne mette pas la charrue avant les boeufs, n’est-ce pas? je m’imaginais déjà prendre de magnifiques photos, j’avais même commencé à vous parler dans un brouillon d’article de ce nouvel appareil photo qui venait d’arriver alors que je ne l’avais pas encore dans les mains… j’y croyais dur comme fer… mais seulement voilà…
- l’Univers serait-il en train de me faire passer un message? J’achète 2 fois le même appareil photo, on me le vole 2 fois! Que faire du dicton «Jamais 2 sans 3»? Si on l’achète directement en France, où l’on a vu qu’il arrivait sans problème à destination, n’y aura-t-il pas alors un autre problème? Suis-je censée acheter cet appareil photo finalement? Mais en anglais, on dit « La 3ème, c’est la bonne! » alors, quel proverbe croire?
- même si je crois que l’Homme est foncièrement bon, il y en a toujours un – et même plusieurs – pour infirmer la règle.
- les douaniers et passeurs de bagages ne sont ABSOLUMENT PAS FIABLES. On sait tous qu’il y a des magouilles, des ententes, des réseaux, des organisations… De plus, après avoir réclamé le vol à la compagnie aérienne, celle-ci ne se porte pas responsable sauf sur la disparition de fringues : comme si c’étaient les fringues les plus volées dans les valises en transit… Pour moi, ce n’est qu’une façon de cautionner le vol; si les compagnies aériennes se portaient responsables, elles feraient tout leur possible pour avoir des salariés honnêtes.
- puisqu’on ne peut rien y faire, soyons plus mâlins et ne tendons pas le bâton pour se faire battre : on n’a cesse de dire qu’il ne faut pas voyager de manière ostentatoire, cela vaut également pour les bagages qui vont en soute lorsque vous prenez un avion. Étant donné que ce bagage est soumis aux scanners dans les aéroports et donc aux yeux peu scrupuleux de certains, qu’il peut être « visité » sans votre permission lors de trajets en bus et/ou perdu en route, il ne doit PAS contenir d’objets qui ont de la valeur à vos yeux, seulement des fringues (ça, ça se remplace, pas le sentiment ou les souvenirs que vous avez mis dans un objet). Tout votre électronique (ordinateur, disque dur externe, clés usb, appareils photos, chargeurs, lecteurs mp3, etc.), ainsi que vos bijoux et argent, doivent voyager avec vous!
- et puis, il faut que j’arrête de trop anticiper sur les choses que je souhaite voir arriver – un nouvel appareil photo par exemple et toutes les photos que j’aurais pu prendre, l’achat potentiel d’une maison, un voyage, la présence de ceux que j’aime, etc. : parce qu’à trop anticiper, à trop rêver, la réalité risque de ne pas être à la hauteur… Si j’arrive à faire ça, peut-être serais-je moins déçue…
Mais n’est-ce pas là perdre sa spontanéité, ses pensées positives, l’utopie d’un monde meilleur qui commence par le respect de chacun? Parce que tous ces vols, attentats, viols, meurtres, anti-gay, anti-différent, n’est-ce pas pûrement et simplement un gigantesque manque de respect envers son prochain?
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Et vous, vous gérez comment la frustration?
[English]
I’m bitter, disgusted, disappointed, gutted, sad… While every day brings its share of reasons to lose faith in the Human race, there comes upon oneself minor other distressful events that don’t help restore it. They even manage to make one wonder how to keep seeing the bright side of things.
I know that next to the bombings in Boston, the fall of a building in a city in France where some of my dear friends live or the earthquake in China which almost passes off unnoticed as everybody’s attention is focused on other subjects, my own little troubles pale in comparison. The thing is, I can’t stand theft, I have great difficulty dealing with the frustration of not being able to defend myself and thus letting others going on with their wrong-doings. Once, just a little while ago, I had trouble swallowing the pill, but a second time only 2 months later?!? Really?
It all started a few months ago when I found myself without a camera. After I sought your advice, I decided to buy a compact one to compensate the loss, one I could later give to Raul so he could play the excellent photographer again. These little things being cheaper in France, I bought one on a french website and had it shipped to my mother; upon receiving it, she took it out of the box, stuffed it in a sock, rolled it in a towel, protected it from bumps and prying eyes, added a few delicacies from France and mailed a full package to Mexico, as she usually does. This time, though, just after passing customs, it completely disappeared… What are the odds?
1st disappointment and frustration…
What then, when 2 friends from France arrived late April for their first vacation in Mexico bringing another camera – I’m resolute to have one – and saw that their suitcases had been « unexpectedly » delayed between flights and wouldn’t make it until the following day? The odds, again? Really??? Upon opening the suitcases 24 hours later, was it really a surprise NOT to find their or my camera in them?
!!!! Frustration builds up exponentially !!!!
What I make up of this all :
- maybe I should learn not to count my chickens before they hatch, right? I was already picturing myself with the new camera, taking plenty of gorgeous pictures, I had already started talking about it in a post draft although I didn’t have it with me yet… I was sure it would work this time… but then…
- would the Universe be sending me a message? I buy the camera twice and it’s stolen twice. In french, we say that if it happened twice, it can happen a third time…. If I buy it again directly in France where we’ve seen that it definitely arrives at destination, will there be another problem? Am I supposed to buy that camera, then? But in english, you say that the third time’s a charm! Which quote should I trust?
- even if I still believe that Mankind is Good, there’s always one – or various – blokes to prove me otherwise.
- customs official and bagage handlers ARE NOT TO BE TRUSTED. We all know there are scheming, understandings, organizations, networks… Futhermore, after calling the airline company, I was told that they are not to be held responsible for other losses than that of clothes : as if clothes were the most robbed item from a suitcase in transit… I think that it’s only making robbing easier; if the airlines were to be held responsibles for all robberies, they would do what is necessary to make sure and have trustworthy employees.
- since we can’t do anything about that, let’s be wiser and not tempt those with bad intentions : we always hear how important it is to travel non-ostentatiously; it’s also worth for the luggage you put in the hold of a plane. Since this item is put through a scanner at the airport, so right in front of possibly unscrupulous eyes, that it can be « visited » without your permission during bus rides and/or lost on the way, it should NOT contain things you consider valuable (your clothes are fine, they can be changed anytime, but anything that is important for you is not that easily replaceable). Everything electronic (computer, camera, usb, hard drives, cables, etc.), as well as all jewels and money, must travel with you!
- I should stop anticipating or wishing for things to happen : have a new camera for example so I could take photos again, the possibility of buying a house, a trip, my loved ones staying close, etc. : because, with anticipation comes high expectations and reality might not be up to them… Should I not anticipate, I won’t be disappointed, will I?
But, doesn’t it mean losing one’s spontaneity, positive thinking and the hope of a better world based on the respect of one another? Since, all these robbing, bombing, raping, murdering, anti-gay, anti-different, aren’t they all purely and simply a huge lack of respect?
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What about you : how do you cope with frustration?
[Español]
Estoy decepcionada, enojada y todo… Mientras cada día nos da razones para dejar de creer en la raza humana, otras se agregan a nuestras vidas cotidianas y me parece a veces aún más difícil ver el lado positivo de todo.
Ya sé que al lado de las bombas en Boston, de la caída de un edificio en una ciudad francesa en dónde viven unos amigos queridos, del terremoto en China al cuál poca gente se interesa porque están enfocados en otros temas, mis problemitas no valen mencionar. El problema es que no soporto el robo ni la frustración de no poder hacer nada en cuento a eso y entonces de dejar ir en toda impunidad a los responsables. Una vez ya me quedó difícil tragarla, pero ¿otra vez 2 meces más tarde? De verdad? No aguanto…
Dejénme contarles : se acuerdan que no tengo cámara desde Diciembre pasado y que, gracias a su consejos, tomé la decisión de comprarme otra, que más al rato iba a dejar a Raúl para que volviera a ser el fotógrafo genial que es. Esas cositas son más baratas en Francia así que compre una en una página web francesa, la había mandado a la casa de mi madre y ella la sacó de su paquete, la envolvió en un calcetín, en una toalla para protegerla de los choques y de los ojos curiosos, y me la mandó por correo normal con otras delicias francesas que la debían esconder. Pasó la aduana mexicana y …. ¡desapareció! Que raro…
1er sentido de frustración y decepción
Llegaron 2 amigas francesas a final de abril para sus primeras vacaciones en México y traían otra cámara – ¡si la quería tener tanto! – pero a la escala en México D.F., sus maletas se quedaron… La coincidencia es más sospechosa aún… Sobre todo cuando por fin llegan a la casa las maletas y nos dimos cuenta de que ¡las habían « visitado » y se habían llevado las cámaras suyas y mía!
¡¡¡¡ La frustración aumenta de manera exponencial !!!!
Lo que me enseña esta situación :
- quizás no debería empezar la casa por el tejado, ¿cierto? Ya me imaginaba tomando hermosas fotos, ya había empezado un borrador de artículo para informarles de la nueva cámara aunque todavía no la tenía en las manos… Pensaba que la segunda vez, iba a funcionar…
- ¿Será que el Universo me está mandando un mensaje? Dos veces compro la cámara, y dos veces me la roban. ¿Que tal del proverbio « No hay 2 sin 3 »? Si la compramos directamente en Francia, dónde vimos que sí llega a destinación, ¿no habrá otro problema? En Inglés al contrario, dicen que la tercera vez es la que funciona… ¿En cuál proverbio creer?
- aunque generalmente creo que el Hombre es bueno, siempre hay uno – o varios – para probarme el contrario.
- NO PODEMOS CONFIAR en los trabajadores en las aduanas ni en los que manejan las maletas. Ya sabemos todos que hay organizaciones, chanchullos, carteles… Además, luego de hacer una queja a la compañia aerea, esa no se hace responsable de los robos o perdidas salvo sobre la ropa : ¡como si fuera la ropa la que más se robará! Para mi, solo significa que dejan hacer; si se haría responsable, haría todo lo que pueda para asegurarse de tener empleados confiables.
- mientras no podemos cambiar esas cosas, seamos más astutos y no demos por qué maltratarnos : siempre han dicho que no se debe viajar de manera ostentosa, también vale para las maletas que van en el compartimiento de equipaje. Dado que este equipaje será escaneado por ojos quizás poco escrupulosos, que podría ser « visitado » durante un trayecto de bus y/o perdido en camino, NO debe contener objetos que tienen valor a sus ojos, solamente ropa (eso, si, se cambia, no se devuelve el valor sentimental que pusieron en algo). ¡Todo lo electrónico (computadora, cables, cámara, discos externos, USB, cargador, lector mp3, etc.), así como joyería y dinero, debe viajar con Ud. en su maleta de mano!
- y también debo dejar de anticipar demasiado los eventos que espero con impaciencia – una nueva cámara y todas las fotos que iba a sacar, la compra de una casa, un viaje, la presencia de seres queridos, etc. : porque, por anticipar demasiado, por soñar demasiado, la realidad se puede hacer menos agradable… si logro en hacer esto, tal vez, estaré menos decepcionada…
Pero si hago eso, ¿no sería como perder espontaneidad, pensamientos positivos, la utopía de un mundo mejor que empieza con el respeto de su prójimo? Porque, todos esos robos, atentados, violaciones, asesinatos, en contra los gays, en contra lo diferente, simplemente es algo de falta de respeto hacia su prójimo, ¿no es cierto?
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Y Uds., ¿comó manejan y se deshacen de su frustración?
Bummer Juls 😦 Have traveled extensively and never once had anything taken. I always carry my valuables and any meds with me so you’d think that’s the answer right? WRONG !! We had to walk about 2 miles from domestic to international when we arrived in Miami on our way to Patagonia from Charleston. My photography backpack weighs an easy 60 lbs when everything is in it. I ruptured a disk during that walk and by the time we got to Patagonia literally could not get out of my seat !! This on the way to a month of hiking and mountain climbing!!! OY When crap like this happens (or your theft for another example) I always use my favorite phrase « There are people living in their cars » – in other words, try to keep your perspective and think of the troubles others have. It always makes me feel better and more appreciative of my little problems vs others’ big ones! Good luck – hope to see your photos again soon!
I know, right! I do just that and just enjoyed every moment I could spend with the girls during their first trip to Mexico. Things are going to settle on their own… Thanks again for your support and for sharing yet another of those « awful » times when we just wish we’d be somewhere else! 😀
I’ll relish in my taking photos with my lovely camera once in France and will be very happy to share them around!
Yes, you can continue with your efforts with the airlines, as people counsel. Maybe something will happen.
But for your peace of mind, I do recommend letting go of it (of any results from it). It is, after all, only a camera. As you say, not a bombing, earthquake, building collapse, air crash, tsunami. You will be back in France in one more month? You will have your camera in one more month! And you will never EVER have anything packed in a suitcase that you cannot afford or bear to have stolen, because things are as they are and not as we wish they were.
(Not to say I’m not mightily sorry for your trouble, because I am. I stupidly left a big bag containing my camera (and precious photographs) in a taxi in San Miguel de Allende. Did someone turn it in? You know no one did. If we’re going to lose anything, the only place to lose it is in Japan, where someone will be guarding it until you return. Failing that, equanimity is the only remedy.)
thanks for taking time to send your good words. my friend has now learnt a lesson (I never travel with anything valuable in the suitcase or backpack that doesn’t stay with me) and I’ll just try and learn to complain clearly to the person in charge in order to obtain compensation. And, I’ll marvel at those times when people are actually good to one another : like that time in New Zealand when my friend forgot her camera in the bathroom somewhere along the road and by the time we were back there, someone had taken it, left their phone number for us to meet them and get it back. it DOES happen and we should focus on those times.
Happy travels to you and take care while in the plane, ha! 😉
I’m so sorry for your triple loss! Amazing. I agree with Alastair. Go to the top with your complaints. It’s always better to start as high as possible.
Will do! Thanks!
that is a very big disappointment to get over; i was without a camera and my computer/files for about six months, and wow, that was frustrating. my camera now is letting me down a lot – it’s had a hard life, but it is still working, cataract and all. sometimes it plays bashful, opens then retracts and says, ‘remove lens cover..’… like you, i am anticipating having a new one but am trying to refrain from buying anything ===== yet… how on earth does one keep a smile in one’s heart when the camera has been purchased and stolen TWICE?
i hope that you soon have a camera in hand. you have my sympathies.
I keep a smile in my heart thanks to all your words! and I get strength from the advice… I’ve gone 5 months without a camera, I’ll make do until I get to France and have mine back. 😀 (see, I smile!)
but it’s hard; you deserve better, but it happened, and we can’t look back.. only forward to when you are reunited with a camera.
karma will catch up with the thieves, and good karma will preside over you. in the end, you’re the true winner, and they are the losers.
z
thank you again for such good vibe! I’ll try to stick to good karma and get rid of those awful awful thoughts these guys put into my head the other day (I wished them harm… terrible!!! I shouldn’t have!). better to have good thoughts.
i’m going to have to write a post soon about the way i finally figured out how to dodge those frustrations if there was truly nothing i could do to make the moment better… it worked and continues to work for me…
sometimes having that right-brained strength is helpful, even if others think i’m a bit too ‘out there.’
z
please do write a post on those good thoughts and frustration management! I’ll be happy to have new ways to cope with it when I can do anything about things. I’d rather be « out there » and happy and free of those thoughts than the contrary! I love the « out there » side of things! 😉 I’ll be there with you! 😀
i will try to bump that one up in your honor!
i’m working on a lot of photos right now, playing catchup on some great moments w/the tour group!
hang in there lovely amiga!
z
😀 having the girls over was the best remedy, don’t worry! but I’m always up for new ways of being happy in spite of the little mishaps!
Cheers to you, Z.!
The only time I’ve had something stolen from my suitcase was coming home from Puerto Vallarta a few years ago. At the airport I took off my sunglasses and threw them in one of the outside zipper pockets of the suitcase before I checked it in. Prescription sunglasses. Gone, when I got my bag in the States to go through immigration. United Air told me they were not responsible. I usually never pack anything worth something in my suitcase. I will be ever so careful when we go to Cancun next fall. It is so frustrating!
I never pack anything valuable in the backpack that doesn’t stay with me; my friend also has learned a lesson. Be it in Mexico or elsewhere, we should always be careful about the belongings in those bags and take with us what matters the most. I wish you a wonderful vacation! Mexico is awesome and so beautiful! I’ll be waiting for your impressions…
That REALLY sucks! Twice no less. I do think Alastair may be onto something too. If word gets out that you’re likely to have your valuables stolen if you fly airline « X, » people may not be so inclined to use them. If you can raise a big enough stink, I think you might see some results. Seriously, if the baggage was delayed, then it arrives a day later with the valuables missing, who the hell else is responsible if not an airline employee?
Agree, again! I’ll do my best! :-O
Good luck! I hope you get some results.
I am sorry this happened to you again. I have had things stolen from my suitcases twice and now I carry everything of value with me. Its heavy work. So many people and handlers have access it would be almost impossible to find the culprit. Could you not order it again and have it shipped and insured through a reliable company. Yes, it would cost more but that is a guarantee. Also was the credit card that you purchased it with come with insurance? Some do? Please let us know it worked out. All humanity is not bad. Once in Acapulco in the 80’s I was detained mysteriously by the border agents at the airport and only $50.00 set me free.
we’re thinking about buying it directly in France; only 1 more month to wait… now that I’ve been without a camera for 5, what’s 1 more, right? and we know it actually makes it to destination in France so that wouldn’t be a problem and we’ll then have 2 cameras! mine, fully repaired and that I’ve missed so much, and the other one with which Raul will be able to play around! 😉
I know and will continue believing that Humanity is not bad. proof is right here.
thanks for your words and support.
You are so welcome!
If the airline companies are not to be held responsible for the people the airline company hires to do the airline company’s work, then what the hell is the extra baggage payment for? I think you should go further than the airline.
I tried to file a complaint for the theft but it probably will just end up with the other complaints as they don’t do anything about it; at least, that’s how the guy on the phone sounded like…
Try again and this time ask for the supervisor. Threaten them with going to the papers.
Really?? does that work? I suck so much at complaining! I should learn that too!
The advantage is, you are on the phone. They can’t see you shaking. I found that out. First thing you do is ask for a name. then ask to speak to a supervisor and ask for his name. Write them down. When you have spoken to him and if you don’t get the resolution you want, tell them that you will make it public knowledge that their airport is free for robbery and that they actually condone it because they are doing nothing about it. You can shake all need to, because they can’t see you. 🙂
all right! with your advice and everybody’s support, I’ll brace myself and call again!
Thank you so much for the kind words and all the help!
Good luck 🙂